Feel so down on myself tonight! Have eaten absolutely ridiculously this week and am the fattest I have ever been! This week I have eaten:
And a macdonalds
That is honestly ridiculous and I’m ashamed of myself! To make matters worse I go to Tenerife on Tuesday feeling like crap coz I look like shit in everything and I’ll be lying round the pool in a bikini feeling self conscious! I absolutely fucking have to sort myself out when I get home and I want to be 9 and a half stone so I’ve got about 2 stone to lose!
away this bank holiday weekend and usually i eat quite badly, i think i’ll allow myself some treats but will try and restrict myself. I WANNA BE SLIM!!! LOL i must remember this! wish me luck! x x
who am i kidding? i totally ate a piece of that cake and it was FUCKING DELICIOUS! lol I’m going to the cinema tomorrow night so ill end up eating nachos when i go there *sigh* why does so much of my social life involve eating bad food? i just wanna be slim!!!! lol
had on OK week apart from a couple of minor setbacks! made a giant cake today but it wasn’t for me so i won’t be eating it! haha i love to be creative and decorate cakes and cupcakes but the thing is i usually end up eating at least 2 cupcakes or 2 slices of cake so i can’t make them nearly as often as i would like to. baking totally destresses me and gives my creative side a workout so i love to do it. hopefully there’ll be some charity events at work i can make cupcakes for etc.
back onto the diet subject, i’m considering starting slimming world because i feel its a very healthy plan with lots of protein and vegetables and cuts out crap. whereas, if i did WW i would tend to use my points on crappy food which means im not changing my diet at all really!
i need some ideas for healthy snacks at work coz theres TONS of biscuits lying around and everyone eats them so ill have to think of some healthy snacks like trail mix or something like that! good luck with your diets and if u have any ideas, send me a message!
Today went ok, had some pre prepared pasta salal for lunch and sweet chilli chicken with salad for my tea, i was so hungry tonight tho that i ended up eating two slices of toast with butter and undid some good work. The trouble is i just cant stand being hungry, i get very irritable and all i can think about is food! the only way i ever lose weight is if i go to bed hungry for some reason. never mind, tomorrow is a new day and a chance to start again!
i found a brilliant new feature on an app ive been using for a while, it counts calories and is called my fitness pal but you can scan products into your food diary using their barcode which is awesome and saves loads of time by not searching/adding it and it means you can easily log any packaged food you eat! so cool!
sometimes with all the good intentions in the world, your friends can totally wreck your diet. i had eaten my dinner last night and was quite happy settling down to watch tv and hadnt even thought about eating. next thing i know my friend calls in with a huge pizza and before you can say ‘i’m on a diet’ ive inhaled two slices!! the pizza from the pizza shop near mine is my biggest weakness in life and to be honest its the one thing i eat where i never regret eating it because its totally worth the calories whereas if i eat a cake i always regret it and think it wasnt worth the calories! so although i enjoyed it, DAMN MY WELL MEANING FRIEND!!
me when i saw the pizza last night:
went to asda today and bought loads of salad stuff and chicken to cook with it etc etc and am going to make some pasta salad tonight for lunch tomorrow, i have 13 weeks until i go on holiday and i need to make the most so its not a last minute attempt to lose weight when im in crisis mode! I CAN DO IT! send me encouragement if ur reading this!
tumblrbot asked: WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE INANIMATE OBJECT?
if i’m losing weight, the scales, if i’m not i hate them! lol
- to feel good about the way i look
- be more confident
- be able to wear what i want
- enjoy clothes shopping
- not to have to pick certain styles of clothes because others dont “suit me” when what i really mean is my arms or stomach look fat in them
- to be able to go out with friends and not feel like the fat one
- to be able to get in a bikini and not feel self conscious
- to be able to bump into people i havent seen for a while and have them think i look great instead of thinking i put weight on
- to buy more styles of professional work clothes i dont currently wear like smart dresses
- to be healthier
- to meet a guy (i know they should like me as i am, but i think if i liked me more then it would show)
- to wear a “bandage dress”
- to not have to wear cardigans over everything coz i hate my arms
- to never have to look at spanx ever again
- to be able to eat badly for like one day a week and healthy the rest and stay the same weight
- to not feel so depressed after ive come home and found nothing to wear
if i think of more i’ll edit and add them but thats it for now!
isn’t it weird how, no matter how much i want to be slim, if someone offers me something nice to eat i forget all of that and just eat it. my lack of motivation/willpower really gets me down sometimes. i wish i could bottle that guilty feeling i get on a night when i have eaten badly that day and my pure desire to lose weight because as soon as i feel that way i resolve to eat better the next day and in that moment i really mean it, but the next day all is forgotten! *sigh*
today didnt go so well, was on a work training day and ended up going for lunch with everyone, had a jacket potato which was ok but had tuna mayo in it :( then for dinner i was in a rush and ended up grabbing a wrap and some crisps, not one of my five a day contained in any of that LOL. i need motivation so may have a bit of a look through tumblr for some inspiration. ps got on the scales this morning and made this face:
Hey to anyone reading this, i am not currently happy with the way i look, since i started uni i have gained two stone and feel really self conscious about the way i look, i dont go out drinking because i dont feel good in what i wear and if i agree to meet people i havent seen since school i always wonder if they will be thinking i have put on a lot of weight, the same goes for facebook photos. i am going on holiday in november and would really like to look good in a bikini by then and so i am going to try and lose some weight. i will maybe do some food diaries or reblog things that inspire me. gimme a message if u wanna encourage me/ ask me anything! x